It’s not you—not a bit. Giles Bowl I. How I could have been such a fool I’ll never know. He was always in a state of semi-intoxication, but he was always gentle with me. “This,” he said, and then: “No! Is this sweeter? Very well. “Before I heard much Wagnerian music I heard enthusiastic descriptions of it from a mistress I didn’t like at school. There was a shrill cry, instantly succeeded by a deep splash. And now I break the seals—for you. I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart. Why don’t you just tell me what is going on with you! Why the police questioned you! Why they’re looking for your mother? I’ll understand! Just tell me and I swear to God Lucy I’ll understand. “I truly am a vampire, John.
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