Arrived at Paddington, he struck across Marylebone Fields,—for as yet the New Road was undreamed of,—and never moderated his speed until he reached the city. " "I'll bring you an armful this afternoon. But at length, there was a click, and with a swish, the panel of painted books swung outward from the wall. " "And what are you going to do with her, supposing I'm fool enough to take this boy with me?" "Send her to my people, in case she cannot find her aunt. The dress was her mother's, and she was wearing it to save a little extra money. " Her attitude now entirely sisterly, he ceased to be afraid of her; there was never anything in her eyes (so far as he could see) but friendly interest in all he said or did. And he, her lawful husband, dared not go to her and console her! Accursed—all of them— Enschede, Ruth, and himself. She knew she was a monster and so did they. My friend the doctor suspected it, and so do I. I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart.
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